Canon Fodder

CHAPTER 458 REPLACEMENT

“I hope it’s me,” I said truthfully. We were being escorted from our holding cell to the teleportation ring. 

“You seriously want to fight without an arm?” Gwen asked 

“I’m not a whiny bitch like you and Peter,” I said, uncaring how annoyed she got. “One arm, no arms, doesn’t matter. I plan to get some revenge.”

“No offense, but I hope you get your ass kicked,” Gwen said. I laughed, resting my arm on her shoulder as she rolled her eyes. 

The night in the holding cell had been uneventful. Jean and Scott had talked and argued all night. On opposite sides of our group I didn’t think she told him about me, since he wasn’t pissed off at me. But I did think they were officially broken up. Jean in charge of her body for the time being. I wasn't sure of their agreement, but I knew Jean wouldn’t be up for PDA around all these people. 

Since Xavier was the only other psychic in our group I wasn’t sure if he knew. But he acted like he didn’t as he trailed behind our group. Anne still riding high from her new Cosmic Force ability. We hadn't talked much, but she was sticking close to me. Scarlet had stayed as far from me as possible. I was fairly certain it was because her dad was there, but I would have to figure out where we were once this was all over with. 

Either way, I was fucked. I had way too many women. Way too close to each other. I had set a rule a while ago to not shit where I ate. I had made that mistake in One Piece and it could have ended in disaster. These were all very strong willed women, that I didn’t think would be up for sharing. 

That reminded me of Demoness back home. Mentally cursing my libido, I knew I had to pick and choose, but it was so hard. Way too many redheads in my harem, that wasn’t technically a real harem since no one knew about each other. I would have to confront all of them sooner or later. My eyes drifted to Jean with the thought. Phoenix had mentioned simply disappearing into the universe, a notion that was sounding more and more appealing as I thought about it. 

The guards led us to the teleporter circle and we stepped on dutifully. On the other side was a much less amenable platform. No longer floating, it was built into the side of the arena. A large window viewing area, Carl Danvers waved us over to the glass facing the stadium. 

“Something is going on,” he said.

“Really?” I asked as sarcastically as possible. 

“Yes, we are much closer to the Majestor’s platform,” he said, pointing up. Confused, I followed where he was pointing and saw that the Majestor’s platform was right above us. As the others from Earth came closer, the floating screens filled with the face of the Majestor himself. 

“Thank you, one and all,” Mandor said. His stupid-triangle head pissing me off more somehow. “Today is a joyous day. For my sister has been found.” He said the words and the camera zoomed out to show that Lilandra Naramani was sitting next to him. No shackles or restraints on her, her face looked placid as the people roared in approval. 

“You all know Lilandra. Mother of the Iull. Provider of the Eventide. And next in line for the throne. She has been brought back safely from the clutches of the rebels,” he said. I was pretty lost, but it seemed he was spinning this whole event as some sort of win for them. Kallark’s words rang in my ears as Mandor continued. He had said they would probably blow the princess up. Since we were so close to them that meant they would blow us all up, blaming humans, Kree, or whoever he wanted. 

“Fuck,” I whispered as my mind raced. 

-What?- Phoenix asked me. 

-We need to move- I said. 

-Now?- She asked, raising her hands, ready to melt everything around us. I was fairly certain she was psychically hiding herself form from the guards so they didn’t recognize her from the day before. That or the Shi’ar thought us humans all looked alike. 

-Not yet…- I thought as I looked around the area for explosives. There were a few pockets of something embedded in the steel frame of the stadium around us, but I had no idea if they were explosives. 

“Let the Haelar begin!” Mandor said and people cheered. 

“Alright,” I said aloud, drawing eyes. “I know you watch everything you stupid Garuda bitch. But I’m sick of playing games. I want to go fight right fucking now. If you don’t I will-” My skin turned red and I popped out of existence, appearing on the fighting room floor. 

“Finally,” I said with a sigh as I smiled wide at the crowd. Charging my throat with Nen I spoke as loudly as possible. My words reverbated in the massive arena as I said, “Listen here you stupid birdbrained fucks.” The words quieted everyone around me. Xavier’s haki skyrocketed in anxiety and anger. I didn’t care. “I don’t give a shit about your holy hand grenades, or made-up wars. All I care about is…” I turned and pointed at the platform the Imperial Guards were at. “Kicking that guy’s ass right there.” 

n/ô/vel/b//jn dot c//om

I pointed at Korvus. The Shi’ar that had beaten me the worst those days ago. A tall man with gray skin, a shaved head, he wore the robe clothes of the Shi’ar, exposing chiseled abs. He smiled down at me widely, showing off his row of pointed teeth. 

“That fucker Korvus. He took my arm. And I want fucking payback,” I said truthfully. Things weren’t going how I had wanted them to so far. I had gone against the Imperial Guards in hopes of learning all of their skills. That proved useless as most everything I did. But if I could at least get payback against this one jackass before I enacted my plan, it would be worth it. 

The arena quieted then cheers rose up as Mandor’s lackey approached the edge of his platform. “Honorable Korvus, do you accept the challenge?” He asked. 

The cameras zoomed to him and he smiled wider somehow. All he did was nod, and his skin turned red as he was teleported opposite me. My anger only grew as the crowd cheered more loudly. 

“Didn’t get enough last time?” The man asked. His voice was deep and helped my anger grow higher. The image of him laughing over me as I gave up still seared into my mind. I had been holding it back, but these people really pissed me off. I had only been trying to hold them off from chasing Lilandra. It looked like that was pointless since she was still captured. 

Annoyed by everyone’s inability to stick to the plan, I channeled Nen into my body as my fist turned black from the Armament Haki. “You were the one that cut off my arm, right?” I asked. I had been knocked out, and to be honest it was still a blur. His smiling face stuck out to me though. 

He nodded as a glowing sword appeared in his hand. It appeared to be covered in a white flame as he began to twirl it around. I extended my hand out, summoning my Soulsword as well. Though I wasn’t wearing the Shi’ar armor I had planned to originally, I felt I could still take this guy. He had fought me with a dozen of his buddies, it was time to show him what I was capable of when I got serious.  

“Shall I take the other arm?” He laughed.

“Go ahead and try,” I said as he disappeared. The man had immense speed in short bursts. A fact that was a bitch to face when I was fighting nearly a dozen Imperial Guards the first time. This time I got to put all of my focus into just him. I used my Timeflow and turned just in time to miss my right arm from being lopped off. The crowd roared but I ignored them as I sliced up. 

I had fought him once, so I knew all of his abilities. Able to move extremely fast in short bursts his eyes widened as my sword went for his middle. He disappeared again, only a few feet away and I flew right at him, my sword aiming right for his neck. His blade met mine and  remembered we were on a timer. Mandor could disappear from his platform at any moment, and blow my people and Lilandra up. Rather than letting this last all day, I summoned Tabi. 

The blue cat appeared overtop of me and immediately fused to me. My skin covered in blue flames as chakra moved through me. I expelled a huge cloud of smoke. Making shadow clones, they tried to grab Korvus, but he disappeared again. I flew at him as the smoke cleared, my shadow clones disappearing as chakra arms on my body began to condense balls of chakra around me. 

The chakra attacks became massive, firing at him as he disappeared and reappeared. Destroying the rubble all around us, the rocks littering the arena became shrapnel, cutting into him as he retreated. Chakra extending from my blade like a physical thing, I sliced down, narrowly missing him and he disappeared again. 

Smiling wide, I knew he was having fun. Underestimating how pissed off I was, and how strong I got when angry. He didn’t notice as the rest of my shadow clones ended their transformation jutsus. No longer hiding as rubble on the arena floor they grabbed his limbs. One threw his sword away as his limbs were held onto tightly. I rushed over to them, smiling wide as he struggled to escape. 

“Let’s see…your left arm is on my right,” I said as I cut off his left arm right around where mine was missing. He yelled and cried out as my shadow clone took the severed arm and tossed it to me. Grabbing it out of the air I began to fuse it to my nub of an arm. His skin gray, I didn’t much care as the spiritual energies of my body and his limb mixed. 

When the arm was lined up with mine and it felt correct, I stopped the Fusion skill and the two separate spiritual energies became one. With a sigh, I began to move my new left arm as Tabi disconnected from me. 

“Much better,” I said, flexing the arm. It was still a little gray, and had sharp nails at the end, but it was a very strong arm. 

“You fuck!” He yelled, his sword disappearing from the floor of the arena, the white flame of the blade engulfed him, powering his Haki further. My shadow clones disappeared as the white flames reached them. He yelled out as he began punching me with his lone arm. Unaware of the imbalance that usually caused, I tripped him, causing him to fall forward. 

“Takes one to know one,” I assured as I began to fly up and up. I needed to work on my one-liners, but later. He began to fly after me. Punching and kicking me, I pretended to struggle as we made our way close to the platform the humans were on and continued raising. When we were close to the Majestor’s platform I could feel the forcefield protecting his vicinity condense. 

Skirting alongside it, until I was level with him, I started fighting Korvus for real. Using my full strength as I showed him that he never had a chance without all of his friends, and a limb missing. Charging nen and Haki in my fist I punched him in the face. As I did I pushed out a Rift behind me as far as I could. 

The Rift formed into my subspace, directly in front of the Majestor who stood up. As he did, a very angry Kallark breathed in deeply as he left my subspace and flew directly into the Majestor. Tearing him in half with a swipe of his hand. 

The cameras that had been facing me, turned to Kallark and the Majestor. Mandor Naramani lay there gasping his last breath. His top half a dozen feet from his bottom half. Lilandra Naramani, who had been next to him, ran to Kallark crying. Spouting some bullshit about almost dying. 

Either way, my work was done as all hell broke loose. 

—

As the Imperial Guard flew to their dying Majestor I dropped down to the platform we had been on. The other Earthlings were already beating up the guards as Scott blasted the glass viewing port. I landed just inside as Magneto grabbed all the guards and threw them out the window by the metal on their armor. 

“Since when has this been the plan?” Xavier asked.

“Since last night,” I said. “I’m honestly surprised it worked.”

“What now?” Magneto asked, looking to me for guidance. I took that as a compliment. 

“Well the Shi’ar don’t appear to like that their emperor was killed in front of them,” I said as Imperial Guards and others flew toward us. “And I don’t know if Lilandra is going to come out alive, since there were more than a few that want the job. Garuda should be distracted with Mandor split in half. I think we should escape.” 

“How?” Xavier asked. 

“Starship,” I said. Pointing up with my new gray arm. “Phoenix, you can go into space, right? Let’s get us a way home.”

“Fuck yeah,” she said, her Haki shifting to that of Nix. She walked over beside me and shot a wave of fire at the guards flying toward us. 

“We need to get Marko,” Xavier said.

“Fuck,” Wolverine said. “I’ll find him. You can probably land a ship down at the platform. Let’s meet there.” He pointed down to the fighting arena. It was rather large so I hoped he was right. I jumped out the window as Phoenix followed. 

“Now this is fun,” she said. Fire danced around her as she matched my speed. 

“Wait!” Anne yelled below us. She was glowing white as she flew to catch up. “I think I can go into space too.” 

“Alright,” I said, really not wanting a drama fueled hijacking of a ship. 

“Oh right, you two were dating,” Phoenix said. “Is that still a thing?”

“What?” Anne asked, blushing as we continued raising upward. 

“Not right now,” I pleaded as I studied the ships above us. Many far too big, I needed a small one that could handle reentry into the atmosphere, or whatever really. I was basing all my knowledge of space, ships, and spaceships on movies. 

“Get in line, sugar tits, he’s ours,” Phoenix said.

“What?!” Anne yelled.

“Fucking fuck. One thing at a time!” I yelled as we rose above the clouds. The air became less dense and I took in a huge lungful of air, praying I really could handle the vacuum of space. It took only a few seconds and we were out in the blackness of space. Phoenix glowing red with flames, Anne glowing white with her Cosmic Force. I ignored their emotions as I focused on trying to find a ship. 

My ears popping, nothing else changed as I flew on. A large ship turning to face us, I noticed a much smaller, but still rather large one attached to it. Docked on the mothership for some reason, the smaller ship was at least as big as a football field. I pointed at it and the girls followed. 

Not so much Star Wars ships, these were still rather big and bulky. Made of metal like everything else on their planet. The Shi’ar inside the ships began to fire lasers at us as we approached. Phoenix’s Haki soared in glee as she fired back at them. Condensing her flames, they shot away from her like lasers as well. I mentally did the pew pew noise with each one she shot, the vacuum of space preventing such needed sound effects. 

-Stop! You’re going to make me laugh- Phoenix said, reading my mind. I rolled my eyes, I needed to watch what I thought about. 

It didn’t take too long to reach the ship. Attached to the bigger spaceship I found a glass opening nearby. Breaking it with a powerful punch, the air was sucked out instantly and the now open window tried to close as a metal shutter shot down. I grabbed it, holding it up as Anne and Phoenix flew through.

When we were inside, the shutter finished closing and the air stopped getting sucked out. My Haki sensing everything, there was no one around us as I made my way to the other ship. 

“This is fucking awesome,” I admitted, unbelieving I actually flew out into space and didn’t die. It was a little cold, but that was the only real change I felt. The last time I had been out in space was when I committed xenocide on an entire alien species. This time I wanted to let them live, which was progress. 

“Why are we sneaking around, let’s just kill these fuckers,” Phoenix said. 

“Cool it, Nix,” I said. “You can be the wild card when we have everyone off planet. For now, let’s hold off on the murder spree.” She laughed giddily as she looked down every hallway, ready to cook people. 

“What the hell?” Anne asked. “Why are you two acting so chummy?”

“Not right now,” I pleaded. 

“We had sex, quite a few times,” Nix said. 

“I told you not to say that!” Jean said, her Haki shifting with her change in personality. 

“You what?!” Anne yelled, her body glowing white again. 

“I’m lying,” Jean said. 

“No, I’m not,” Nix cut in and she began yelling at herself again. 

“Fucking fuck,” I groaned as I came to the hatch that led into the smaller ship. “Not right now!” I yelled, my voice echoing in the hallway as two aliens popped out and began firing laser guns at us. 

Cursing, I used Timeflow to dodge the projectiles. Knocking one of them down, Nix grabbed the other one. Her hand glowing red she crushed his windpipe causing him to drop to the ground as he fought for breath. 

“Please don’t kill for fun,” I said, stomping on the man’s skull to break it. “We don’t want Shi’ar on Earth’s doorstep due to a blood debt.”

“Fuck Earth,” she said. “I’m not going back there.”

“That’s fine,” I said. “But our friends and family are there.”

“That’s right,” Jean said, taking control again. “Our parents live there.”

“Fine,” Nix said, exasperated. “It’s my time, and you know it. Stop interjecting.” Jean didn’t appear again, but I could almost feel the inner Haki of the girl, it felt like her Haki resembled that of someone grumbling and annoyed. 

We continued down the hall. A few Shi’ar jumping out here and there. I honed in on the bridge as they began fortifying it from attack. 

“So are you coming with me?” Nix asked as I increased our pace. 

“What?” I asked, distracted as I looked back at her. 

“Are you going to explore the universe with me?” She asked, the bloodthirsty Nix now a little hopeful as she eyed me. Anne stared wide eyed at me but I ignored her. 

“Maybe,” I admitted with a sigh. “Not right now though.” She smiled wide and ran forward. I caught up to her as a line of guns were fired our way. 

“Leave one alive, preferably one that can fly,” I said to Nix. 

“I’ll try, these are squishy,” she said as two were incinerated by her flames. I knocked most out as we moved through them. Anne helping now and then with her cosmic blasts. I was thankful that for once she didn’t want to fight or talk. Though extremely angry at me, most of her anger was directed to Phoenix who straight up ignored the girl, making Anne angrier. 

When it was just the three of us awake on the bridge we had left a few alive. But my eyes were drawn to the controls of the ship. A joystick and something that looked like a gear shifter on the arm rests of a seat that looked out the window, all my dreams and accomplishments began to pale in comparison to being put in this situation. 

“I’m driving,” I said excitedly as I jumped in the seat. Ready to finally learn how to fly a ship.